Little Known Facts About Rod Blagojovich's Hair

I'm watching Governor Rod on Greta Van Sustosterone so I thought I'd share this list of little known facts about RB's Hair. Say what you want about RB, but his hair is badass.

1. Feng Shui or fengshui is the ancient Chinese practice of placement and arrangement of space to achieve harmony with Rod Blagojovich's Hair.

2. Indigenous Amazonian warriors rub their arrow tips in RB's Hair before hunting.

3. In Mexico, RB's Hair is called "Pelo del Diablo" and a festival is held in its honor each year to keep its wrath from destroying villages.

4. Chuck Norris once got into a fight with Rod Blagojovich's Hair. He lost.

5. "Paradise Lost" isn't really about the fall of Satan from heaven. It's about the time Rod Blagojovich shaved his head.